On Being Married…

A very close friend of mine got married this weekend, and so I’ve got weddings and such on the brain. I was looking through pics and stuff from our wedding tonight, and I came across the awesome advice cards from our Pre-Wedding Celebration and my bridal shower. I don’t know, reading some of these, it makes me feel like maybe some people don’t think marriage is super easy? But always definitely worth it? Am I right? (*wink*)

I was just encouraged by some of these as I picked through them, and thought it might be helpful to someone else as well. So funny how much we can learn from others who have gone before. It was good for me to reminded of all this stuff. You don’t have to stick it out if you don’t want to…(you realize that of course). Some of these are too awesome not to share:

“I have two thoughts for you. A successful marriage is the union of two great forgivers. Zephaniah 3:17 – The Lord your God is with you, He is mighty to save. He will take great delight in you, He will quiet you with His love, He will rejoice over you with singing.” – Love Aunt Pam

John 12:24 “…except a grain of wheat fall into the ground and die, it abideth alone, but if it dies, it brings forth much fruit.” Behind every good party or event, someone (or two or three someones) have put aside their self to prefer another. Many times in marriage and later motherhood, you will need to die to yourself for others…and in doing so you will bring forth much fruit.” Jean Ellen Hornberger 6/6/04

“My Dear Becky! Keep in mind Galatians 5:13…”You my brothers were called to be free. But do not use your freedom to indulge the sin nature; rather, serve one another in love. The entire law is summed up in a single command; “Love your neighbor as yourself.” Serve each other fully and completely in love. You won’t be sorry!” – Ruthann Anderson

“Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is-his good, pleasing and perfect will.” Romans 12:2 – You followed your heart and God’s will and found Jon. I wish you complete happiness! Leslie Loehwing (Beveridge)

To Jon and Becky, from Nancy Illian – This verse has meant so much to me for the past ten years. I have grown to understand it more and more. Maybe you’ll find encouragement in these words. “This is what the Sovereign Lord, the Holy One of Israel says: “In repentance and rest is your salvation, in quietness and trust is your strength.”

Especially for Bekah and Jon – June 6, 2004 – Psalm 33:3 – For the word of the Lord is right and true, He is faithful in All he does! Ephesians 4:32 – Be ye kind to one another – Bekah to Jon – Jon to Bekah – tenderhearted, forgiving each other, even as God for Christ’s sake has forgiven you. A truth you’ve known since childhood, but so relevant to all relationships. God’s word is the ONE steadfast and sure thing! Trust it, rest in it, & know it will lead and guide you through this new part of life’s journey. – Ruth Wheeler

My wisdom for you is very simple and true. Always be true to the heart that God has given you. He has placed within you a wonderful combination of gifts, talents and love that no one else has! Chris Ryniker

Ecclesiastes 4:12 “Though we may be overpowered, two can defend themselves. A cord of three strands is not quickly broken.” Keep the Lord as your focus. Both individually and as a couple, as your THIRD strand, and He will help you through it all! Amy Estes

Liking is a Feeling. Loving is Doing. Aunt Tammy

Becky and Jon, Enjoy each moment. The good and the bad. You’ll learn and you’ll grow closer as you work things out. Remember the joy is in the journey. Keep your eyes on Jesus always! Sabra Wilson

1 Peter 2:9 – But you are a chosen people, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, people belonging to God that you may declare the praises of Him who called you out of darkness and into his wonderful light.” You are HIS Bekah, he has chosen you. Remember, there is no one like you.

Allow each other the space to grow and change into the people God has created you both to be.

Pack a luggage full of forgiveness for your journey.

Best words you can say, “I’m sorry honey. You’re right darling! I love you.”

Although it may seem counter-intuitive, remember that the surest way to ensure your own happiness is to put your spouse’s needs ahead of your own. If you both do that, you will truly be blessed.

“Do you want to be right? …or do you want to be married?” – Dad on 7th Heaven

Love unconditionally. Even when you most feel like saying a mean word or throwing something back in the others face, or even when you are spoken to unfairly – speak in love having no regrets – hold your words – answer in love even if you don’t feel it at the time. Always say you’re sorry and mean it, with no “buts” – FORGIVE LOTS!

Time is a friend to marriage; it lends perspective to problems and can deepen your love. Pray, Love God, and hang in there.

This may have been more fitting on my anniversary…can I back date it?

These are the Hands

These are the hands of your best friend, young and strong and full of love for you, they are holding yours on your wedding day, as you promise to love each other today, tomorrow and for always.

These are the hands that will work alongside of yours, as together you build your future.

These are the hands that will passionately love you and cherish you through the years, and with the slightest touch, will give comfort like no other.

These are the hands that will hold you when fear or grief fills your mind.

These are the hands that will countless times wipe the tears from your eyes, tears of sorrow and tears of joy.

These are the hands that will open again and again as you release your personal interests for the needs of the other.

These are the hands that will tenderly hold your children.

These are the Hands – Bob Biggs (for Jon and Bekah on July 9, 2004)

These are the hands that will help to hold your family together as one.

These are the hands that will give strength when you need it.

And these are the hands that even when wrinkled and aged, will be reaching for yours, to offer the same unspoken tenderness through just a touch.

And upon these hands will be placed the rings that will always serve as a reminder of the promise made to one another today.

Bob Biggs (for Jon and Bekah on their wedding day, July 9, 2004)

Hi Ho, Hi Ho, it’s back to work I go…

I have been trying very hard to find something I can do part time in the evenings or for part of the day to help bring in a little bit of money. About a week ago, I got a tip that there was a billing position available that I might be interested in. I shot off my resume, and heard the next day that the Vice President had got me an interview for the next day. It all started on a Sunday, and by Friday I had an offer for a full time job. We feel like the way this fell in my lap is totally a God thing. Not exactly what I had in mind…that’s for sure. But I trust that God knows what He’s doing. My first day will be tomorrow. I’m trying to get used to the idea of waking up early…and waking Olivia up early. She’ll be with our neighbor, which makes me feel better than she’s so close to home and with someone who I know is so good with kids. I have been so blessed to spend these last 18 months at home with my sweet little lady, and now it’s time for me to get back out there!

The hardest part right now is that it is inevitably looming over my head…Wednesday slowly approaches. I know that it will come and go, and I will survive. But for now, it’s hard to make it seem real. And Olivia hasn’t quite been herself lately. She’s been sort of clingy and lovey. It’s almost as if she knows, too, that the very special time we’ve shared over the last 18 months is coming to an abrupt end.

I feel like being Olivia’s mommy has become my identity, and I’ve been perfectly and totally okay with that. I’m a little nervous about getting back out there and making sure I haven’t lost it! But I’m grateful for the opportunity. Lots of changes in our lives of late. I think (or I guess I know) it will get easier and easier as time goes on. Going back to “work” (work outside of the house) in addition to being a mama must have it’s challenges…ones I can’t even begin to know about yet. I will take it one day at a time. We’ll be okay.

You are My Hiding Place

You are my hiding place.
You always fill my heart with songs of deliverance.
Whenever I am afraid, I will trust in you.
I will trust in you.
Let the weak say I am strong in the strength of the Lord.
I will trust in you.

What’s on your mind? Rebekah Barber Biggs

…loves her peach satin hands.

…has not even begun to do ANY Christmas shopping yet.

…wonders why there are two ways to spell Hannukah (Chanukah).

…just baked pumpkin chocolate chip cookies. Delicious.

…seems to have some changes coming down the pike. With a side of mixed emotions.

…thinks this one will be an emotional weekend.

…erased over 100 friends on facebook today.

…knew that her car would smell like rancid milk before long. No matter how quickly she sopped up the spilled milk with a warm, wet rag.

…needs a girls night out…asap.

…has been enjoying typing Davis’ journals from 2007 of late.

…feels like laundry is never-ending.

…can’t think of anything but the Glee rendition, and the kiddo in the wheelchair everytime she hears “Empire State of Mind” by Jay-Z featuring Alicia Keys.

…was going to go to youth group, but Olivia needed a bath and didn’t want to keep her up late for the third night in a row.

Get in here!

So, I might be a dork. After my two mile run today, I ran into Kroger…all gross and sweaty. I was walking by the lunchmeats, and there in front of me was the guy who sells cars around here. You know, the one from the commercials. He appears in the craziest places…like other people’s showers, or in their beds in the morning…magically, when they talk about car shopping. His company recently bought the Chevy dealership here in Miamisburg. Anyway, I resisted the STRONG urge to say, “Did somebody say something about buying a car???” And moved on. Well, just about two minutes later, I was looking for the graham cracker sticks to dip in the pumpkin dip I was going to make…and here he comes around the corner again! Right there in my face. He was calling for his friend, and looked sheepish when he realized he was not in the aisle. So, a small child comes running around the corner and says, “Excuse…my dad wants to know if you like to sell cars?” And so commercial guy turns around and all animatedly says, ” I LOVE selling cars!” Without skipping a beat, I turned around, stretched out my hands and in a low voice shouted, “Did somebody say something about buying a car??????” It was slightly embarrassing. But it went over without a hitch. We laughed hysterically. Good times.

Short story…I conversed with someone semi-famous today.

A Word from Jim.

‎| After a quick scan of how my Facebook friends are voting it looks like all the Christians are canceling each other out. Pretty much split 50/50.

A Novel Idea.

So, lately I’ve been thinking about writing a novel. I’ve been thinking about writing a cute romantic comedy that could later be made into a movie. It would go a little something like this…

Girl has hang up. Boy has obstacle. Both of them are living miserable or at least mediocre lives. Girl and Boy meet. You think for a while that Girl and Boy would be perfect for each other, and that they will be so happy together. But then the hang up/obstacle/maybe both (I haven’t decided yet) will come back into the play. It’ll be something like…a child the other one doesn’t know about who has been away for a blissful summer…or an inability to love…or like one of them will do something that is misconstrued by the other for their job…or like maybe they won’t have REALIZED that this person was the right person because they were just really good friends looking for love in all the wrong places, and some other person comes into the picture….or they will just clam up because they’ve failed at this love thing in the past…or they’ll see one little thing that happens in this other person’s life and decide it’s just too much to bear. Anyway, there will be some CRAZY event…like a death in the family, or an almost marriage to the OH SO OBVIOUSLY wrong person, or a job out of state, or a new love who seems even more perfect, or SOMETHING that will serve as a catalyst and then BAM! Just when the reader had given up, they will end up together. The ending will be very happy…warm fuzzies for all. You might even say that it was PREDICTABLE in the end.

I mean, I have NEVER seen anything like this done. I think it’s a sure shot. Just need to get some of the specifics down on paper…and have my characters size me up, see if I’m worthy of writing their story…and then I’ll be in business. We’ll be rich! (That last part, about characters sizing me up was for Bobbi Jo. Lest she wonder).

(If it’s not obvious…this is to demonstrate my utter frustration with the predictably and sameness of many of the romantic comedies out there. Why do I even bother to watch them/read them).

GQ photo shoot of Glee Cast

I am sad to hear of this photo shoot for the November issue of GQ. I glimpsed this on one of the gossip shows on cable this slow Saturday morning. I am disappointed to see the girls in this light. I realize that they are actresses, and in fact, not high school students. But…their show is supposed to be a family show. I think for the most part the show has done a good job of addressing realistic issues for “the family” from the United States. Teenage pregnancy, cliques, the underdog, dealing with homosexuality and prejudice against this lifestyle. These are all issues, that like it or not, the American family faces on a very regular basis. Sometimes I think it’s a little risque…and I’m not even sure I’d let my kiddos watch it. But it’s a huge eye opener for parents. Unfortunately. I think? I mean, it’s true, I am now 12 years out of high school, so perhaps even my take on high school and the life of a high school student is far outdated. I never ceased to be amazed by some of the things that the young people who I love, and who are so near to my heart, have to deal with on a daily basis. I wish I could shield them, and protect them and make it all better so very often.

Anyway, The Parents Television Council did not appreciate the photo shoot either. In fact, the President, Tim Winter, had this to say about it, “It is disturbing that GQ, which is explicitly written for adult men, is sexualizing the actresses who play high school-aged characters on ‘Glee’ in this way. It borders on pedophilia. Sadly, this is just the latest example of the overt sexualization of young girls in entertainment.” The Parents Television Council also said, “With a demonstrated market of eager fans for an entertaining, musical-themed program like ‘Glee,’ we wonder why the show’s creators feel the need for such graphic sexualization of women. Interestingly, the photos of the male character showed him wearing a shirt, tie and vest.”

I was just disappointed to see this photo shoot. I realize I probably have expectations that are too high for this cast, as they are just that…a cast. But I can’t help feeling a little sad about this. I think I feel protective of them. I haven’t watched any of the episodes from this season yet. I have heard that it has taken a different direction this season, and perhaps I will be disappointed when I find time to sit down and get caught up. But I love the characters these kids play. I love a show that incorporates music so well. I love high school kids. In the formative years. I hate that sex sells. My eyes saw these photos, and my heart is saddened.

A word from Jim

There are few facebook status updates from my friend Jim that don’t give me a good chuckle. I’ve decided to share a few that are worth sharing.

Anyone out there considering reading a Mark Driscoll book, allow me to summarize them all in 3 points:

1) Men, stop playing video games – watch MMA fights instead.
2) Women, quit your jobs, have babies, be quiet.
3) Joel Osteen, Rob Bell, Brian McLaren – you be quiet too, like the women.